Sure it's easier to say yes, but at what price to your peace of mind? Here's why saying no may be a healthier option for stress relief.
Be honest with yourself. Is your plate piled too high with deadlines and obligations that you're trying to squeeze in between meetings? Are you trying to cram too many activities into too little time? If so, stress relief can be as straightforward as just saying no — or no more.
Why say no?
There are countless worthy requests out there just waiting to decrease the amount of free time you have, and increase your level of stress. So, it's easy to create stressful situations in your life, if you don't turn down requests for your time and talents.
Who will make costumes for the school play or coach your children's Little League team if you don't? The answer may not be simple, but you should still consider these reasons for making sure it's not you.
* Saying no can be good for you. Saying no is not a selfish act. In fact, it may be the most beneficial thing that you can do for your family and your other commitments. When you say no, you'll be able to spend quality time on the things you've already said yes to.
* Saying no can allow you to try new things. Just because you've always helped plan the company softball tournament doesn't mean that you have to keep doing it forever. Saying no will free up time to pursue other hobbies or interests.
* Yes isn't always the best answer. If you're overcommitted and under a lot of stress, you've got a much better chance of becoming sick, tired or just plain old crabby, which doesn't benefit you or anyone else.
* It's important to recognize the power of other people. Let those around you come through. Although others may not do things exactly the same way you would, you can learn a valuable lesson by allowing others to help, while gaining treasured free time.
When to say no
Sometimes it's tough to determine which activities deserve your time and attention. Use these strategies to evaluate obligations — and opportunities — that come your way.
* Find yourself. Saying no helps you prioritize the things that are important to you. You'll gain time that you can commit to the things that you really want to do, such as leaving work at a reasonable hour to make time for a mind-clearing run at the end of the day. Examine your current obligations and overall priorities before making any new commitments. Ask yourself if the new commitment is important to you. If it's something that you feel strongly about, by all means do it.
* Weigh the yes-to-stress ratio. Is the new activity that you're considering a short- or long-term commitment? Taking an afternoon to bake a batch of cookies for the school bake sale will take far less of your precious time than heading up the school fundraising committee for an entire year. If an activity is going to end up being another source of stress in your life — especially for the long term — take a pass.
* Let go of guilt. If friends want to get together for an impromptu evening out on the town when you've already scheduled a quiet evening at home with your partner, it's okay to decline their offer. Do what you've set out to do and don't veer off that path because of feelings of guilt or obligation. It will only lead to additional stress in your life.
* Keep your current commitments in check. If you have relatives coming over for dinner, don't go overboard. Order pizza or ask everyone to bring a dish to share.
* Sleep on it. Are you tempted by a friend's invitation to volunteer at your old alma mater or join a weekly golf league? Take a day to think over the request and respond after you've been able to assess your current commitments as well as the new opportunity.
How to say no
No. Nope. Nah. See how simple it is to say one little word that will allow you to take a pass on the things that aren't a priority? Of course, there are always instances when it's just not that easy. Here are some things to keep in mind when you need to say no:
* Practice full disclosure. Don't fabricate reasons to get out of an obligation. The truth is always the best way to turn down a friend, family member or co-worker.
* Let them down gently. Many good causes land at your door, and it can be tough to turn them down. Complimenting the person or group's effort while saying that you're unable to commit at this time helps to soften the blow and keep you in good graces.
Saying no won't be easy if you're used to saying yes all the time. But learning to say no is an important part of simplifying your way to a better, less stressful life.
Saturday, June 30, 2007
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
In Pursuit of Happiness
This may change your mind in whether or not you think you're trapped in your current position.
Back in 1978, Joanne Davidow was a frustrated 35-year-old saleswoman in a high-end ladies' clothing boutique. She felt stifled. "If I gave my opinion about the business to the owners, they didn't want to hear from me," she says.
Desperate for a change, she studied for a real estate licensing exam. Today she has 70 agents working for her at Prudential Fox & Roach in Philadelphia, and she racked up $50 million in sales in 2004. "I had no idea whether I would be successful or not," Davidow says. "But on my first day as a real estate agent, I felt like I was home."
Almost half of the U.S. workforce changes careers at least once, according to the Census Bureau. And at any point, roughly half of workers say they are unhappy at work. But the decision to leave a steady job—no matter how soul-crushing—is a difficult one, particularly if a dream position requires new skills or a specialized degree.
Worker bees often fantasize about breaking out of the cubicle to do something more hands-on, says James Borland, a coach with The Five O'Clock Club, a career-counseling network. "Particularly if they've been let go, a lot of people say, 'I'm going to buy a bed-and-breakfast in Vermont.' But they don't realize how hard they would work."
Harnessing momentum for change is admirable, experts say, but they caution career switchers to keep their feet on the ground. Make sure your fantasy job is both economically viable and in line with your personal strengths and values before jumping ship. "Often, when someone wants to go back to school, she is doing it as an escape," says Connecticut-based career coach Julie Jensen. School lovers, she says, may happily apply to academic programs without critically assessing the jobs they will lead to.
But sometimes heading back to school is the only way to make a sharp career turn. Tess Autrey Bosher, 30, gave up a six-figure salary to follow her passion: cooking. While she enjoyed law school, she was unhappy during her three-year stint as a lawyer. She quit the firm to attend the Institute of Culinary Education in New York City, where most students are career changers. She hopes to work in a French restaurant where she's likely to earn just above minimum wage.
Frustrated workers often discover that the seeds of a more fruitful career were planted long ago. Christina Drogaris, 30, held hectic film-production jobs for five years after college. But she had always had a flair for interior design; as a kid she would accompany her mother, an antiques dealer, on furniture-hunting exhibitions. After thoroughly scoping out the field, she decided to attend night classes at Parson's School of Design in New York City. "School was much easier this time around," she says. "I finally knew what I wanted to do, so I couldn't wait to go to class."
Jensen advises people who wish to strike out on their own to make a small move before the big one—by taking on consulting work or a freelance assignment, for example, or by volunteering at a restaurant before enrolling in cooking school. "You need to break it down into small pieces, so it doesn't feel like you have to jump across a deep canyon," says Washington, D.C., coach and psychologist Ellen Ostrow. "Talk to people who have made these kinds of transitions and create a strategy. Unless you are in jail, you are not trapped. You do have options."
Back in 1978, Joanne Davidow was a frustrated 35-year-old saleswoman in a high-end ladies' clothing boutique. She felt stifled. "If I gave my opinion about the business to the owners, they didn't want to hear from me," she says.
Desperate for a change, she studied for a real estate licensing exam. Today she has 70 agents working for her at Prudential Fox & Roach in Philadelphia, and she racked up $50 million in sales in 2004. "I had no idea whether I would be successful or not," Davidow says. "But on my first day as a real estate agent, I felt like I was home."
Almost half of the U.S. workforce changes careers at least once, according to the Census Bureau. And at any point, roughly half of workers say they are unhappy at work. But the decision to leave a steady job—no matter how soul-crushing—is a difficult one, particularly if a dream position requires new skills or a specialized degree.
Worker bees often fantasize about breaking out of the cubicle to do something more hands-on, says James Borland, a coach with The Five O'Clock Club, a career-counseling network. "Particularly if they've been let go, a lot of people say, 'I'm going to buy a bed-and-breakfast in Vermont.' But they don't realize how hard they would work."
Harnessing momentum for change is admirable, experts say, but they caution career switchers to keep their feet on the ground. Make sure your fantasy job is both economically viable and in line with your personal strengths and values before jumping ship. "Often, when someone wants to go back to school, she is doing it as an escape," says Connecticut-based career coach Julie Jensen. School lovers, she says, may happily apply to academic programs without critically assessing the jobs they will lead to.
But sometimes heading back to school is the only way to make a sharp career turn. Tess Autrey Bosher, 30, gave up a six-figure salary to follow her passion: cooking. While she enjoyed law school, she was unhappy during her three-year stint as a lawyer. She quit the firm to attend the Institute of Culinary Education in New York City, where most students are career changers. She hopes to work in a French restaurant where she's likely to earn just above minimum wage.
Frustrated workers often discover that the seeds of a more fruitful career were planted long ago. Christina Drogaris, 30, held hectic film-production jobs for five years after college. But she had always had a flair for interior design; as a kid she would accompany her mother, an antiques dealer, on furniture-hunting exhibitions. After thoroughly scoping out the field, she decided to attend night classes at Parson's School of Design in New York City. "School was much easier this time around," she says. "I finally knew what I wanted to do, so I couldn't wait to go to class."
Jensen advises people who wish to strike out on their own to make a small move before the big one—by taking on consulting work or a freelance assignment, for example, or by volunteering at a restaurant before enrolling in cooking school. "You need to break it down into small pieces, so it doesn't feel like you have to jump across a deep canyon," says Washington, D.C., coach and psychologist Ellen Ostrow. "Talk to people who have made these kinds of transitions and create a strategy. Unless you are in jail, you are not trapped. You do have options."
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Latina Producers
Latina Producers
As the years go by and our population grows, more and more opportunities become available for Latinas, and many of them are in, YES, the entertainment industry! Most likely when the word “producer” is mentioned, what comes to mind is a dumpy, balding, smoking cigar-chomping man cutting deals in a cluttered office. But a voracious appetite for television programming and innovative films, coupled with an increasing Latino population in the United States, has opened a once closed door to ambitious and talented Latinas with an eye on calling the shots behind the scenes. Meet Barbara Martinez-Jitner, Kathryn Galán, Nely Galán, Shawna Baca, and Corina Bartra, rising stars in the film, television and music field. This Latinas are a perfect example of why a growing number of Latinas are scoring success in Hollywood and elsewhere in the entertainment industry, a demanding profession that not long ago was male domain.
“There are a lot of Latinas who are producers today, and the reason is simple,” says Barbara Martinez-Jitner, one of the top Latinas in the film industry. “Latinas are producers in the home, we run everything. It wasn’t Cortez who conquered the New World, it was Malinche,” she emphasizes referring to the native woman who was the conquistador’s mistress and confidant. “It’s the women who make things happen!” Martinez-Jitner proudly says to have learned her producing techniques from her grandmother, who was a farm worker. “She miraculously raised eight kids,” she says. “If she could do that, I think I can produce a movie!”
Martinez-Jitners’ career is a clear representation of climbing up the ladder—her resumé includes acting, writing and directing as well as producing. On the 1999 film Selena, based on the life story of the slain Tejano pop singer, she worked with famed director and producer Gregory Nava, whose critically acclaimed feature films include El Norte and Mi Familia. Within a few years, she was establishing herself in the industry as a writer and producer of American Family, the first Latino drama with a Latino-theme broadcast nationwide on television. Nominated for the Golden Globe and Emmy awards for her work on American Family, Martinez-Jitner is now poised to garner even greater fame.
Her current project is Bordertown, a feature film starring Jennifer Lopez, based on the ongoing and tragic story of murdered Mexican women in Ciudad Juárez. To research the story, she risked her own life and went undercover, posing as a worker in a maquiladora (factory) to gain firsthand knowledge of the reality that has led to the unsolved murders of over 400 young women in recent years. “In that society,” she charges, “the people who are working in those factories, their lives mean nothing. You can murder one of those women, and there are no repercussions.” In the film, which debuted at the Berlin Film Festival in February and is scheduled for release worldwide later this year, Lopez portrays a newspaper reporter who courts danger while investigating the crimes.
Driven by a passion to explore themes that have captured their imagination, Latina producers are an increasingly important presence in the motion picture and television industries. Some have risen to the top by virtue of the fame they’ve garnered and the power they command as successful actresses. Salma Hayek, for instance, has put her producer’s stamp on two recent productions—the 2002 film Frida, a portrait of legendary Mexican artist Frida Kahlo, and Ugly Betty, ABC’s hit TV series starring Golden Globe award-winner America Ferrera. Eva Longoria, known as the most beguiling of ABC’s Desperate Housewives, has also logged producer’s credits for the 2004 film Carlita’s Secret and the 2006 ALMA Awards broadcast. But for the vast majority of Latina producers, the road to success has come through hard work away from the glare of the spotlight.
Kathryn Galán, an experienced producer whose credits include films such as French Kiss and Becoming Colette, has a unique perspective on the profession as an executive director of the National Association of Latino Independent Producers (NALIP). She speaks from hard-earned experience when she says, “being a producer is very challenging, but when it works, it is the most rewarding.”
Galán’s organization serves as a focal point for Latinos working in the film and television industry and throughout these years, Galán has seen commendable progress. “Over a dozen Latino and Latina-made or focused documentaries have received national broadcasts in the past couple of years,” she says. “Programs like The George Lopez Show and Ugly Betty, not to mention Resurrection Blvd, American Family and Welcome to Tucson have had runs that build audiences, make money and advance careers. More Latinas, for instance, are considering film school and attending professional development programs that advance their projects and relationships.”
One executive whose career personifies the success that Latinas are currently enjoying as producers is Nely Galán. For over a decade, her Galan Entertainment firm has been a force in developing new programming in both English and Spanish for networks such as HBO, NBC, Televisa, Telemundo and Fox, for which she produced the hit series The Swan. Galán’s record of success has made her one of the most influential Latina executives in the entertainment field and a role model for those aspiring to follow in her footsteps as a successful producer. “I think this is a great time to be Latina in this business,” Galán says. “We have a unique voice that represents many millions of people and companies want to reach us.”
In her history-making trek to the top of her profession, Galán learned quickly that the road to success was fraught with both obstacles and opportunities. “Being Latina has been very helpful to me in being a producer in the mainstream; it gave me a differentiating proposition,” she recalls. “I was different than everyone else, but it has been more difficult to be a Latina producer working in the Latin market within the U.S. and Latin America, where they have a harder time accepting women in this role. However, what has been difficult is just the choice of deciding to be a producer—it is not an easy career for anyone. It is similar to being a real estate developer.”
For Galán, being in the entertainment industry is a high risk but rewarding business. “You spend a lot of time putting projects together on your own time that don’t amount to anything,” she says. “Many of the people in it are rich to begin with, so they have the advantage and the staying power. However, when it all works it’s amazing. I feel like I get to be an investment banker, a real estate developer, a marketing guru and a creative idea person all in one career. It’s never boring.”
Fledgling Latina producers who hope to replicate Galán’s record of success know they face an uphill climb, but, driven by strong personal interests, they forge ahead, paying their dues and waiting for recognition to follow.
Shawna Baca was a stage actress before she became interested in filmmaking and producing. She quickly attracted attention, winning praise for her short film 3:52, featuring America Ferrera. “It’s important that we tell our stories,” Baca states emphatically. “Part of the reason acting was such a turn off was due to the roles that were out there for women, especially minority women. We seem so behind the times. I felt a strong desire to work on films that showcased Latinos in a positive light. With independent films growing in popularity, it was time to jump into the game.”
Today, Baca is working on a documentary that explores a theme that is close to her heart, especially to her descent. “My mother’s side of the family is Pasqua Yaqui, Apache and Mexican,” she explains. “My father’s side is Spanish. My grandmother, who is full-blooded Indian, half Yaqui (Mexican Indian) and half Apache (American Indian) always took me to Native American Pow-Wows since I was little. I’ve come to know the community well. When a Danish producer friend of mine expressed an interest in me taking her to a Pow-Wow, she was blown away by the beauty of the tradition.” Ever since, Baca explains to partnered up with her producer friend to make a documentary that explores the modern traditions of Native Americans and show how Pow-Wows honor their tradition and keep them alive.
Barbara Martinez-Jitner
Kathryn Galán, executive director of the National Association of Latino Independent Producers (NALIP)
Nely Galán, producer of The Swan
Corina Bartra, producer, composer and singer.
Shawna Baca, actress and independent filmmaker
It’s not only in film and television that Latinas are making headway as producers, in the equally competitive music industry, Latina artists who assume the producer’s role in managing their careers have to consider every detail, from raising funds to marketing. Composer and singer Corina Bartra, whose latest album is Bambu Sun on her own Blue Spiral label, works tirelessly to get her concepts from the studio to the marketplace. “The most challenging thing as a producer is to come up with the money to do the project and organize it,” she explains. “You have to pick the material, musicians, and studio, and you have to organize rehearsals, get art work for the CD cover, and many other things. For me, music goes beyond being just an entertainment form. And, ultimately, the greatest challenge facing independent producers is finding ways of marketing the recording. This requires all of your skills, and some luck.”
The good news is that, as NALIP’s executive director Galán sees it, “Hollywood is a pretty color-blind business. Good executives with taste, experience and relationships can become successful producers.” What stands out to Galán is that Latinas have only begun to make big inroads as producers. “Latinas are wildly underrepresented in the executive and decision-making ranks of Hollywood,” she observes. “And those working in independent film do not yet have wide rolodexes full of equity investors such as doctors, lawyers, and entrepreneurs who are willing to take a gamble on talented young Latina filmmakers. We are making progress, but these are barriers that impede success.”
Baca, for one, is up for the challenge. “This is a great time to be a producer in the entertainment industry,” she says. “With the demand for Latino projects and the success rate of independent filmmaking, this is a good time to tell our stories from our perspectives and environments. I have a voice today that my great-grandmother didn’t have, nor did my grandmother or my mother. We face the challenges of being a minority and Latina. But I’m not going to stop, and that’s what makes it unique.”
As the years go by and our population grows, more and more opportunities become available for Latinas, and many of them are in, YES, the entertainment industry! Most likely when the word “producer” is mentioned, what comes to mind is a dumpy, balding, smoking cigar-chomping man cutting deals in a cluttered office. But a voracious appetite for television programming and innovative films, coupled with an increasing Latino population in the United States, has opened a once closed door to ambitious and talented Latinas with an eye on calling the shots behind the scenes. Meet Barbara Martinez-Jitner, Kathryn Galán, Nely Galán, Shawna Baca, and Corina Bartra, rising stars in the film, television and music field. This Latinas are a perfect example of why a growing number of Latinas are scoring success in Hollywood and elsewhere in the entertainment industry, a demanding profession that not long ago was male domain.
“There are a lot of Latinas who are producers today, and the reason is simple,” says Barbara Martinez-Jitner, one of the top Latinas in the film industry. “Latinas are producers in the home, we run everything. It wasn’t Cortez who conquered the New World, it was Malinche,” she emphasizes referring to the native woman who was the conquistador’s mistress and confidant. “It’s the women who make things happen!” Martinez-Jitner proudly says to have learned her producing techniques from her grandmother, who was a farm worker. “She miraculously raised eight kids,” she says. “If she could do that, I think I can produce a movie!”
Martinez-Jitners’ career is a clear representation of climbing up the ladder—her resumé includes acting, writing and directing as well as producing. On the 1999 film Selena, based on the life story of the slain Tejano pop singer, she worked with famed director and producer Gregory Nava, whose critically acclaimed feature films include El Norte and Mi Familia. Within a few years, she was establishing herself in the industry as a writer and producer of American Family, the first Latino drama with a Latino-theme broadcast nationwide on television. Nominated for the Golden Globe and Emmy awards for her work on American Family, Martinez-Jitner is now poised to garner even greater fame.
Her current project is Bordertown, a feature film starring Jennifer Lopez, based on the ongoing and tragic story of murdered Mexican women in Ciudad Juárez. To research the story, she risked her own life and went undercover, posing as a worker in a maquiladora (factory) to gain firsthand knowledge of the reality that has led to the unsolved murders of over 400 young women in recent years. “In that society,” she charges, “the people who are working in those factories, their lives mean nothing. You can murder one of those women, and there are no repercussions.” In the film, which debuted at the Berlin Film Festival in February and is scheduled for release worldwide later this year, Lopez portrays a newspaper reporter who courts danger while investigating the crimes.
Driven by a passion to explore themes that have captured their imagination, Latina producers are an increasingly important presence in the motion picture and television industries. Some have risen to the top by virtue of the fame they’ve garnered and the power they command as successful actresses. Salma Hayek, for instance, has put her producer’s stamp on two recent productions—the 2002 film Frida, a portrait of legendary Mexican artist Frida Kahlo, and Ugly Betty, ABC’s hit TV series starring Golden Globe award-winner America Ferrera. Eva Longoria, known as the most beguiling of ABC’s Desperate Housewives, has also logged producer’s credits for the 2004 film Carlita’s Secret and the 2006 ALMA Awards broadcast. But for the vast majority of Latina producers, the road to success has come through hard work away from the glare of the spotlight.
Kathryn Galán, an experienced producer whose credits include films such as French Kiss and Becoming Colette, has a unique perspective on the profession as an executive director of the National Association of Latino Independent Producers (NALIP). She speaks from hard-earned experience when she says, “being a producer is very challenging, but when it works, it is the most rewarding.”
Galán’s organization serves as a focal point for Latinos working in the film and television industry and throughout these years, Galán has seen commendable progress. “Over a dozen Latino and Latina-made or focused documentaries have received national broadcasts in the past couple of years,” she says. “Programs like The George Lopez Show and Ugly Betty, not to mention Resurrection Blvd, American Family and Welcome to Tucson have had runs that build audiences, make money and advance careers. More Latinas, for instance, are considering film school and attending professional development programs that advance their projects and relationships.”
One executive whose career personifies the success that Latinas are currently enjoying as producers is Nely Galán. For over a decade, her Galan Entertainment firm has been a force in developing new programming in both English and Spanish for networks such as HBO, NBC, Televisa, Telemundo and Fox, for which she produced the hit series The Swan. Galán’s record of success has made her one of the most influential Latina executives in the entertainment field and a role model for those aspiring to follow in her footsteps as a successful producer. “I think this is a great time to be Latina in this business,” Galán says. “We have a unique voice that represents many millions of people and companies want to reach us.”
In her history-making trek to the top of her profession, Galán learned quickly that the road to success was fraught with both obstacles and opportunities. “Being Latina has been very helpful to me in being a producer in the mainstream; it gave me a differentiating proposition,” she recalls. “I was different than everyone else, but it has been more difficult to be a Latina producer working in the Latin market within the U.S. and Latin America, where they have a harder time accepting women in this role. However, what has been difficult is just the choice of deciding to be a producer—it is not an easy career for anyone. It is similar to being a real estate developer.”
For Galán, being in the entertainment industry is a high risk but rewarding business. “You spend a lot of time putting projects together on your own time that don’t amount to anything,” she says. “Many of the people in it are rich to begin with, so they have the advantage and the staying power. However, when it all works it’s amazing. I feel like I get to be an investment banker, a real estate developer, a marketing guru and a creative idea person all in one career. It’s never boring.”
Fledgling Latina producers who hope to replicate Galán’s record of success know they face an uphill climb, but, driven by strong personal interests, they forge ahead, paying their dues and waiting for recognition to follow.
Shawna Baca was a stage actress before she became interested in filmmaking and producing. She quickly attracted attention, winning praise for her short film 3:52, featuring America Ferrera. “It’s important that we tell our stories,” Baca states emphatically. “Part of the reason acting was such a turn off was due to the roles that were out there for women, especially minority women. We seem so behind the times. I felt a strong desire to work on films that showcased Latinos in a positive light. With independent films growing in popularity, it was time to jump into the game.”
Today, Baca is working on a documentary that explores a theme that is close to her heart, especially to her descent. “My mother’s side of the family is Pasqua Yaqui, Apache and Mexican,” she explains. “My father’s side is Spanish. My grandmother, who is full-blooded Indian, half Yaqui (Mexican Indian) and half Apache (American Indian) always took me to Native American Pow-Wows since I was little. I’ve come to know the community well. When a Danish producer friend of mine expressed an interest in me taking her to a Pow-Wow, she was blown away by the beauty of the tradition.” Ever since, Baca explains to partnered up with her producer friend to make a documentary that explores the modern traditions of Native Americans and show how Pow-Wows honor their tradition and keep them alive.
Barbara Martinez-Jitner
Kathryn Galán, executive director of the National Association of Latino Independent Producers (NALIP)
Nely Galán, producer of The Swan
Corina Bartra, producer, composer and singer.
Shawna Baca, actress and independent filmmaker
It’s not only in film and television that Latinas are making headway as producers, in the equally competitive music industry, Latina artists who assume the producer’s role in managing their careers have to consider every detail, from raising funds to marketing. Composer and singer Corina Bartra, whose latest album is Bambu Sun on her own Blue Spiral label, works tirelessly to get her concepts from the studio to the marketplace. “The most challenging thing as a producer is to come up with the money to do the project and organize it,” she explains. “You have to pick the material, musicians, and studio, and you have to organize rehearsals, get art work for the CD cover, and many other things. For me, music goes beyond being just an entertainment form. And, ultimately, the greatest challenge facing independent producers is finding ways of marketing the recording. This requires all of your skills, and some luck.”
The good news is that, as NALIP’s executive director Galán sees it, “Hollywood is a pretty color-blind business. Good executives with taste, experience and relationships can become successful producers.” What stands out to Galán is that Latinas have only begun to make big inroads as producers. “Latinas are wildly underrepresented in the executive and decision-making ranks of Hollywood,” she observes. “And those working in independent film do not yet have wide rolodexes full of equity investors such as doctors, lawyers, and entrepreneurs who are willing to take a gamble on talented young Latina filmmakers. We are making progress, but these are barriers that impede success.”
Baca, for one, is up for the challenge. “This is a great time to be a producer in the entertainment industry,” she says. “With the demand for Latino projects and the success rate of independent filmmaking, this is a good time to tell our stories from our perspectives and environments. I have a voice today that my great-grandmother didn’t have, nor did my grandmother or my mother. We face the challenges of being a minority and Latina. But I’m not going to stop, and that’s what makes it unique.”
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Just Live Out the Sex Fantasies of Your Dreams ...
Live Out the Sex Fantasies of Your Dreams
Certainly nothing is unnatural that is not physically impossible....
Crowd Scenes. Different Strokes. Domination and Discipline. Flying Solo. Girls and Girls/Boys and Boys. Head and Tail. Pursuit and Capture. Serendipity.
The provocative themes from Letters to Penthouse are the stuff of sex fantasies, hot-blooded writers speak in their unguarded correspondence of carnal rubbing and licking, devouring and pumping — in settings like a college dorm room and a backyard pool. The popular editions of Letters, with their cover-to-cover stories of daring experimentation, are evidence of an open-minded interest in the vast variety of imaginable sexcapades.
Try This at Home
Experimentation breeds excitement in the bedroom. Keeping things hot can be as simple as reading an erotic book or trying a new sexual position (maybe taking a page out of the Kama Sutra). Or consider these creative ways to make sure you and your partner don't become bored in bed.
Once in a while, pick a different place and time. Awaken your partner before the alarm goes off for some morning sex. Or try a 3 a.m. thriller for a change. Make love on the kitchen floor, consider visiting the guest bedroom for another change of venue, take your blindfolded partner to the nearest "no-tell motel," or drive a little farther to your own little love shack in the mountains. Stop on the way for a back-seat "quickie," or rendezvous with your lover at a private picnic spot.
Take turns at role-playing. Rachel obliged sit-com "Friend" Ross by donning the Princess Leia look straight out of Star Wars. Some men might have a hankering for a classic French maid or a buxom blonde. Women might appreciate the chance to make a move on Elvis, or a doctor or a lifeguard — to each her own. Any fantasy is fine, sexologists (sex therapists) say, as long as it improves intercourse rather than detracts from it.
Women tend to have fantasies about relationships and great moments they've had, or "being-taken" fantasies, says sociologist Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D., while men often have "submission fantasies — she sees him, wants him."
It's All in Your Head
By definition, fantasies live in the mind. "It's not a fantasy if you go out and do it," says Howard Ruppel, Ph.D., chancellor at the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality. Your thoughts during sex are not a reflection of your real-life mindset. Rather, sex offers the opportunity "to experience things you can't possibly act out," wrote the late Alex Comfort, M.D., in his classic bestseller The Joy of Sex (recently updated 30 years after its first edition). "These fantasies can be heterosexual, homosexual, incestuous, tender, wild, or bloodthirsty — don't block, and don't be afraid of your partner's fantasy; this is a dream you are in."
Think your partner will take pleasure in playing along? In some relationships, revealing your fanciful desires to your partner can fuel sexual fulfillment, Schwartz says. "It can produce a huge amount of intimacy if you're sharing these most private thoughts only with each other, which demonstrates a deep trust."
But only do so if you know your partner will respond positively — otherwise, don't feel the need to tell all, says Nancy Friday, author of the bestsellers My Secret Garden, Forbidden Flowers and Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women's Sexual Fantasies.
Good Kind of Mind Game
Sex is a game with only two rules, Comfort wrote: Don't do anything you don't enjoy, and try to indulge your partner's expressed needs. Men and women should take turns setting the game plan. Heed Comfort's words: "[S]ex is no longer what men do to women and women are supposed to enjoy." Indeed, a fantastical adventure — where both partners are enthusiastic participants — could be just the recipe for a fulfilling sex life.
Certainly nothing is unnatural that is not physically impossible....
Crowd Scenes. Different Strokes. Domination and Discipline. Flying Solo. Girls and Girls/Boys and Boys. Head and Tail. Pursuit and Capture. Serendipity.
The provocative themes from Letters to Penthouse are the stuff of sex fantasies, hot-blooded writers speak in their unguarded correspondence of carnal rubbing and licking, devouring and pumping — in settings like a college dorm room and a backyard pool. The popular editions of Letters, with their cover-to-cover stories of daring experimentation, are evidence of an open-minded interest in the vast variety of imaginable sexcapades.
Try This at Home
Experimentation breeds excitement in the bedroom. Keeping things hot can be as simple as reading an erotic book or trying a new sexual position (maybe taking a page out of the Kama Sutra). Or consider these creative ways to make sure you and your partner don't become bored in bed.
Once in a while, pick a different place and time. Awaken your partner before the alarm goes off for some morning sex. Or try a 3 a.m. thriller for a change. Make love on the kitchen floor, consider visiting the guest bedroom for another change of venue, take your blindfolded partner to the nearest "no-tell motel," or drive a little farther to your own little love shack in the mountains. Stop on the way for a back-seat "quickie," or rendezvous with your lover at a private picnic spot.
Take turns at role-playing. Rachel obliged sit-com "Friend" Ross by donning the Princess Leia look straight out of Star Wars. Some men might have a hankering for a classic French maid or a buxom blonde. Women might appreciate the chance to make a move on Elvis, or a doctor or a lifeguard — to each her own. Any fantasy is fine, sexologists (sex therapists) say, as long as it improves intercourse rather than detracts from it.
Women tend to have fantasies about relationships and great moments they've had, or "being-taken" fantasies, says sociologist Pepper Schwartz, Ph.D., while men often have "submission fantasies — she sees him, wants him."
It's All in Your Head
By definition, fantasies live in the mind. "It's not a fantasy if you go out and do it," says Howard Ruppel, Ph.D., chancellor at the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality. Your thoughts during sex are not a reflection of your real-life mindset. Rather, sex offers the opportunity "to experience things you can't possibly act out," wrote the late Alex Comfort, M.D., in his classic bestseller The Joy of Sex (recently updated 30 years after its first edition). "These fantasies can be heterosexual, homosexual, incestuous, tender, wild, or bloodthirsty — don't block, and don't be afraid of your partner's fantasy; this is a dream you are in."
Think your partner will take pleasure in playing along? In some relationships, revealing your fanciful desires to your partner can fuel sexual fulfillment, Schwartz says. "It can produce a huge amount of intimacy if you're sharing these most private thoughts only with each other, which demonstrates a deep trust."
But only do so if you know your partner will respond positively — otherwise, don't feel the need to tell all, says Nancy Friday, author of the bestsellers My Secret Garden, Forbidden Flowers and Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women's Sexual Fantasies.
Good Kind of Mind Game
Sex is a game with only two rules, Comfort wrote: Don't do anything you don't enjoy, and try to indulge your partner's expressed needs. Men and women should take turns setting the game plan. Heed Comfort's words: "[S]ex is no longer what men do to women and women are supposed to enjoy." Indeed, a fantastical adventure — where both partners are enthusiastic participants — could be just the recipe for a fulfilling sex life.
People of the island of Puerto Rico
There are about two million Puerto Ricans in the United States. Most of them live in New York City. Puerto Ricans consider themselves Americans but they are also proud of their island and their culture: music, dance, customs and traditions, food, arts, religion, and language. They are a lively and happy people.
CUSTOMS AND TRADITIONS
Puerto Rican culture is alive in our community. Puerto Ricans keep their customs strong by keeping their traditions. Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Day, and Puerto Rican Day are the best times to see, hear, and feel the spirit of being Puerto Rican. On these holidays Puerto Rican families come together. People in our community enjoy what it is to be a family- Puerto Rican and American. And being American you can either speak English or Spanish and make new traditions.
We celebrate the holidays much like the people in Puerto Rico do. Parents and grandparents bless the children with "La Bendicion". We stay in touch with our families and help out when needed. We also try to speak our language at home so that it is handed down from one generation to the next.
Every year Puerto Rican families in New York celebrate Puerto Rican Day either by joining or watching the parade in Manhattan with a Puerto Rican flag in hand or just viewing it on TV. They also hang flags in their cars or homes. This is one way many Puerto Ricans remember and show pride in their culture. This has been a tradition for many years and it is a way of keeping Puerto Rican culture alive and strong.
Christmas time is a special celebration for everyone every year. Everyone in the family comes together and enjoys a great time. We sing, dance, and eat many traditional food, such as "all-you-can-eat-buffet" at Christmas with rice, pigeon peas, roast pork, vegetables, and cakes or sweets. It is a mix traditional Puerto Rican and American treats with candy canes, chocolates, and other treats for children. Special Navidena music is played during this special holiday season. You can also hear Latin music and see the people dancing the Salsa and the Bolero. For this occasion, we do not wear special clothing or costume. We dress comfortably to enjoy the occasion.
FOOD
Puerto Ricans eat a special food called tostones for snacks which is fried plantains (large starchy bananas). If you want a hearty meal try a bowl of asopao, a stew made with vegetables, rice, and meat or fish. We eat meals like this for every special occasions. Puerto Ricans love to eat mangoes especially when they are fresh. We also eat many other fruits such as bananas, coconuts, and mangoes.
For lunch or dinner, here are some dishes you may enjoy eating:
1. Frijoles negros (black bean soup)
2. Sopon de pollo con arroz (chicken soup with rice)
3. Pastelon de carne (meat pies)
4. Lengua rellena (stuffed beef tongue)
5. Sesos empanados (breaded calf brains)
6. Lechon asado (barbecued pig)
7. Nisperos de batata (sweet potato balls with coconut)
8. Arroz con pollo (chicken with rice)
9. Boudin de pasa con coco (coconut bread pudding)
CLOTHING
Like the other ethnic groups in our community, Puerto Ricans wear special clothing during special occasions. Women usually wear flowers in their hair, loose colorful blouses, and skirts especially used for dancing. Men wear hats and scarves around their loose shirts. Both show Spanish influence.
MUSIC AND DANCE
Music is always a part of the Puerto Rican way of life. They love to sing and dance during fiestas and festivals. Their music and dance have Spanish influence with flamenco style moves and traditional costumes.
We have different types of music and dance like the Salsa, Danza, Plena, Bomba, and Cha-Cha. It means a lot to very Puerto Rican family to hear the Puerto Rican beat.
Salsa ia a spicy dance because of its beat. Musicians blend African and Caribbean rhythms for the beat that always gets the crowd to dance. Salsa bands have several singers, a piano, a bass (large stringed instrument), trumpets, trombones, and saxophones. We use the Salsa for concerts, festivals, and other special gatherings like Block Association parties and shows. We also use the maracas (rattles) or tapping cowbells. Whenever Puerto Ricans hear the Salsa they get up and start dancing to the beat of the drum.
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